Coping with the sensory overload.

We didn't understand why Harry couldn't cope in certain situations. The situations varied, not usually the same, there was no constant we could pinpoint to make it obvious for us. This was inceredibly hard as until recently Harry could not talk. He was incredibly good with non verbal communication, so I knew when he wanted food or drink. But in unfamiliar settings it became downright scary. For at least a year I avoided all social contact with friends, some family and any playgroup. It was too hard and to be honest in was embarassing. I couldn't stand people staring at me and Harry and assuming I was doing something wrong. At the time I really had no idea it was sensory related. Loud noises would set him off- not all mind you it just depended on the day. Dirty hands and face were unacceptable and people touching the item he had fixated on at the time wouls send him into a fit. Mums would get downright cranky at me when I didn't make Harry share. Parents would always ask why I wasn't making Harry join in the 'group' when he was sitting quietly by himself playing. Harry didn't like people, especially in large groups. There was no way I was going to essentially torture my son so these parents felt placated that I was 'teaching' Harry something they felt I should teach him

We were finally referred to a paediatric occupational therapist who specialised in autism. It completely opened our eyes. We found strategies for dealing with some of the situations. Harry needs 'down time' alone. It is perfectly acceptable for him to sit in his room and watch a video. He doesn't get overstimulated - normal living does this - it has the opposite effect it helps calm him and regulate his body. We brought him an iPad using Harrys Facshia funding. We can take his regulator with us anywhere. He can focus on one thing and stay calm in highly stressful situations and environments. He can watch movies, listen to music and play repetitive games which he adores. He has become a whiz at.mix and match and has a fantatsic memory!

It is amazing how much you learn about yourself once you experience life differently. I have found I was very judgemental of other mothers and their children. I would classify children as naughty, rude, violent and parents as useless and lazy. Without ever thinking there may have been an element to the situation I didn't know about. That maybe there was more to the child than just being naughty. I urge all parents to not judge on first appearances. Certainly don't allow your child to be hurt or pushed aside, but at times some children need a bit of extra care to help stay calm and some lee way to participate appropriatley in a situation.