The starting school dilemma!

The current stress that is occupying my mind is when to start Harry in school. Next year he will be 4 turning 5 in March. He was assessed by someone at preschool at the end of last year and I still don't know where she is from! But I happened to randomly run into her while we were out and she recognised Harry, and basically she said "whatever you do, DO NOT enrol Harry in a special school. He is more than capable of mainstream schooling". So that was one decision that was easy to make! But as early starters has now been phased out I have had people tell me that no one enrols their child in school at 4. When my first son started Kinder at least half of the kinder (5 classes of about 22) were 4 years. I also know quite a few friends who are strating their children at 4 in the same school. But the big question is will Harry cope?

I have been told I am stupid for even considering starting him at 4. I think it would be stupid to not think about the idea. His preschool is nice, they treat him well, and he enjoys himself there immensly. Wether its making him school ready is another story. For a normal child that does not have autism its a lovely environment where they are constantly singing to you and inviting you to join in to fun activities. School is going to be a BIG shock for someone like Harry. But does that mean I just put the shock off for a year? My intention would be to have Harry do Kindergarten for 2 years. One year to learn to socialise and basic appropriate behaviours in class. The next year would be to actually learn kindergarten things eg. reading and writing. I think it would be mean to keep him in such a sheltered environment of preschool for one more year and then say 'well your 5 turning 6 now, you get one chance at Kinder so you better make it a good one'. Then he has just one year to learn everything and not be able to repeat! What if he is constantly behind because he was never able to learn things properly?

I discussed my fears and opinions with the school principal. He was more than supportive. He was more than happy for Harry to do 2 years of kinder and seemed to think this was perfectly acceptable. We would apply for funding of course and the biggest hope is that he could get funding for someone to be with him at recess and lunch. These are the times when things are going to get hard. When he is unsupervised, there are big kids, and he copies innappropriate behaviours as he doesn't know any different. Unfortunately Harry is going to be harder to teach than other kids. Wether he starts when he is 4 or 5. I was given the opinion by someone "I'd be really annoyed to get someone like Harry in my class". Unfortunately thats the life of a teacher, hopefully there will be funding available and support from other teachers. It is a fantastic school here, there are a number of other children with special needs, so I can't imagine Harry is going to be a shock to the school system.

We will need to organise an IQ test, another developmental assessment (if anyone calls me back) and apply for funding. Luckily the principal has said that even though we are out of area he will definetly accept Harry and there is no need to decide till the end of school. So thats a relief!! Oh how will I make this decision?? Whose opinion should I listen to? Family, experienced principal, preschool teacher, myself who should always know best?? I guess I will see what the assessments show and keep trying to decide!